I have been watching this movie for a long time now; sitting in this theater for an eternity, or so it seems. How I got here, I don’t remember. When this will end, I haven’t been told.
I have been laughing, crying, loving, hating, completely transfixed by this character on screen which I identify as myself. His miseries I endure as mine, his achievements I celebrate as mine; he is me and I am him, a character on a
movie, a projection from an ingenious machine armed with a silky stream of light. Does it make any sense? None whatsoever! And still, here I have been all these years, unable to realize the absurdity of this situation.
I have been identifying with a projection of what, I ask myself. Of a reel loaded with images, some sort of a memory bank, which were originally produced by a bunch of actors performing on a script spurting from somebody’s imagination. So, basically, I am somebody’s dream; I have been sitting in this theater all this time identifying with an actor following a set script. But it looks so real: the decisions I take, the gains and losses, the apparent laws of cause and effect.
I look around and see a packed theater, every single attendee engrossed in their personal screen, totally immersed on their assigned characters, laughing, crying, loving, and hating with them. Wait a minute! Nobody is realizing the
truth behind these empty images! It is not real, people, it is not real, I shout and shout, but nobody listens.
Among the flock of attendees, a woman catches my attention. She doesn’t seem much interested in her movie; as a matter of fact she is intentionally looking for something or somebody in the crowd. “She seems quite familiar”, I think. And then I remember her, sometime ago, sitting next to me, telling me something about dreams and characters and breaking the spell. I remember being annoyed at the time by this stranger who didn’t let me
concentrate properly on myself (I mean my character). Was she the one that prompted me into taking my eyes off the screen and start looking at myself? Suddenly I feel a rash of disproportionate gratitude towards her. Also
admiration as she continues to talk to people even though barely anybody pays any attention to her. She plants seeds and doesn’t even care whether they will ever make it above ground. But maybe she already knows that sooner or later
they will all do.
I look back at the screen alerted by some unforeseen danger that looms over my character. And there it is again, the fear crawling up my spine, the cold sweat on my forehead…a soft pad on my shoulder. Startled, I look back and there she is, smiling with an understanding smile, bringing me back to the theater, to my real Self.
“ How easy it is to go back down the rabbit hole!”, I exclaim
She smiles again. “It won’t be so easy anymore now that you know about the big farce. But it will still take you a little time to stop believing in that character of yours. Just be patient and keep looking at yourself and soon you will
understand why you are in this strange theater watching this strange movie.”
“ And once I stop identifying with my character, what will happen? Will the movie end?”, I eagerly ask
“ No, the movie doesn’t end until it ends for everybody but you will be able to enjoy it with no strings attached”
I watch her walk back to her seat. Suddenly I realize I forgot to ask her name. Probably it doesn’t matter anyway. I don’t even know who I AM at this point. Time to close my eyes and find out. I AM, I AM…